Looking through rose colored glasses

Today is not a good day for me. I was up almost all night with irritable bowel syndrome. They say this is from stress. I have STRESS? lol...

I was invited by Lily (remember my rock?) and her daughter Sunflower to lunch at my all time favorite mexican restaraunt. We went and I ordered lightly - remember I am on a diet. I did not eat many chips - and very little of my meal. I figured since I had been dieting, it was not setting well with my tummy - and I had been up all night with IBS. Anyway, I did not feel quite right, but I really enjoyed the company :-)

I have bleeding ulcers and just after lunch I started bleeding again. It was a horrible gush of what looked like tons of blood. I know it wasn't, but it wasn't just a little bit either. I have bleeds several times a year, but last time it was this bad - I nearly bled to death - literally. I am terrified! I keep telling myself I can psych myself into not bleeding, but I am not really that confident.

What will the kids do without me if I go into the hospital? Havoc wreaked last time I went in, and Red lost it - he has no tolerance for my life. I keep telling myself it could be many other things that cause bleeding - but then Red reminded me that they are not good choices either. I will pray, ask for prayers - and I will stop this flow with sheer will power and prayers. The glasses are not rose color - they are ruby today.

Off to lay on the hammock in my garden and put my feet up.
If you are so inclined, please say a prayer for my healing.

Cajunsis